Am I the rival of my peace?
Commentary by José Parés Pérez, Concepción, Chile.
Why do you treat yourself badly?
Perhaps you do not realise and you believe that it is a way of life like any other. Maybe some kind of belief makes you assume that you must suffer in order to attain future benefits. Life is a wonderful manifestation of the Universe, which has no other reason to exist, than that of being. All that is expected of you is that you are what you are. That you do not abandon what you are by seeking something that you are not. Everything you are, you are already. So, live life as it comes, accepting what you cannot change. You do not need to search for anything, live what you are in the present moment.
Is there any point in your regretting the past? Is it helpful for you to yearn for the future because you are dissatisfied with what you are at present?
It gives the impression that you do not love yourself. You are constantly remembering something that you disliked about yourself and that caused you pain or what people said to you and that offended you. You may not be doing it on purpose, but you are doing it. You are letting yourself be carried away by memories, brooding without being aware of it, about what has been done to you or what has happened to you. You feel like a victim of a fate that brought all of this on you. You do not believe that you deserve it and you do not accept it. It is true that you do not deserve the torment that you are inflicting on yourself. The life you lead is for other things, not to punish you for anything. All of that is in the past and that past is history. It is not important. You can save yourself this torment if you decide to live your present life with awareness. And you are not only torturing yourself with things that are no longer part of your life; you are causing yourself harm by the tension that all of this produces in your body. Illnesses are often the result of tension. It is not about forgetting everything that troubles you. You do not have to make a futile effort to forget.
You must simply avoid letting yourself be carried away by these thoughts. If they arise, take time to feel what you do or what you do not do. You can use any of your senses to pay attention to them, your breathing, walking etc. to stop those of your thoughts that distract you from the present moment. Your interest in yourself will bring you harmony, consistency and peace of mind. You do not need to go out and search for anything. Maybe you cannot imagine the wonder you are. You are a wonder of the Universe. If you observe yourself you will be able to discover that and you will cease to mistreat yourself. What you are deserves all the attention that you are paying to things that do not deserve it. Live an aware life.
Take responsibility for your life.