Do I know how to disobey my violent reactions?

Commentary by José Parés Pérez, Concepción, Chile.

If there is one thing that is difficult to learn in our lives it is to create the intention of controlling those reactions that affect our relationships with others and, particularly, to set ourselves to control them. It should not be forgotten that the way we react to life’s events is something that we have learnt since the first moments of our existence.  It is something that is deeply ingrained in our legacy of instincts, habits, character, beliefs and the rest.  It is so characteristic of us that often we identify with it and we do not desire to change it although we may be aware that it harms others.  It requires quite a high degree of interest in ourselves and sensitivity towards others in order to act consistently to “disobey” our violent or unpleasant reactions.

There are interesting issues to take into account when working on this aspect of ourselves:

– the one that has been highlighted here is to have the will to control those reactions,

– what exists, in the internal workings of our behaviour is the opportunity to act; there is time between perception and reaction to intervene.

However, both issues require attention to the present not only to bring about the intention to work on this through the increase in our interest in others, but also to observe ourselves and act in time.

Disobeying ourselves is a requirement when what we dislike about ourselves spoils the harmony and peace of mind that our freedom of being gives us.