When I look for myself, do I experience separation?

Commentary by José Parés Pérez, Concepción, Chile

We have already referred previously to the topic of seeking. It is a subject that often occupies our mind and seems benign. Seeking suggests that I have a positive intention to find something that will make me happy when I find it. It seems like a good plan whichever way you look at it. However, we must be very alert. We may be unconscious victims of a desire or an attachment. We may also be being swept along by thoughts that make us believe that we are not good enough or we do not deserve what we really are. Generally you search when you are not satisfied with what you are or what you have. Of course, in the eyes of the kind of society or culture that surrounds us, generally, we are not seen as being perfect. But..
We constantly confront a duality. A need to decide what is closer to the truth of what we are: what we feel within us, or what others preach.
And this decision faces us in everything we do.
If I decide to act as society expects, for example, that I must be successful to stand out, then I must accept that my reality, what I am, may make me “think” that I am not what I want to be. And in such a case, the emotions I experience are frustration, unease, anxiety, fear, sadness, etc. On the other hand, if I decide to be myself, just as I am, I learn to sense who I am and get to know myself; next I learn about myself and awaken an interest in myself that leads me to cease judging myself and to love and accept myself. My sensibility and understanding of the reality of which we form part increases. I start to feel part of what we all are. The separation I saw between what I am and the society and culture that surrounds me, disappears. I am no longer two, but one. You begin to feel a reality that is harmonious, coherent and at peace. To feel this way is to be aware of this much sought after and misguided happiness. Happiness does not come to us, it is in us. It is feeling as one, not two.